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Tears tumble from my face as I stumble into my room and fall straight to the floor.

I’ve been holding it back.

I shut the door.

Suddenly I feel more trapped than I was before.

The four pale walls consume my every being and I curl into a ball with the weight of them.

I feel weak, diseased and like my heart, once again, fell to the floor as I mourned over the loss of something I thought I had.

I had two choices, whether to pick it up or leave it. I left it. I just did what I did last time, tried to ignore it. I tried to drown it. My heart, I mean.