Moving past your pain

Originally posted on daughter by design:

VICTIM MENTALITY, OVERCOMING VICTIM MENTALITY,We have all been a victim of something in our lives.

A victim of hateful words.

A victim of painful circumstances.

A victim of physical, mental, or emotional abuse.

That abuse may have happened one time and once it happened everything in your world changed.

Sometimes that abuse happens for weeks, for months, and for years and when it stops we don’t even know how to live life normally anymore.

And then we have to make a very important choice:to let it continue to reign in our lives or to do what it takes to overcome it.

We choose whether we will be victorious over our circumstances or whether we remain victims long after the abuse is done.

And sadly, many people choose to live life with a victim mentality believing that once you are a victim you are always a victim.

That once you have been broken you…

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What Is My Purpose? And Banana Pancakes!

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I’m just going to get straight to the point. I can be unbelievably undisciplined when it comes to reading my bible. Who would have thought that, huh? Lisa loves to read… so this is weird. Yes, I do love love love to read but I love to read page turners and things that are easier to follow and easier to remember. I don’t know if that makes any sense. But sometimes I feel like I don’t understand what I’m reading when I read the bible and it frustrates me so much and then I’m not motivated to read it. I’m sure I’m not the only one here… Or I read something and I am thinking about something else and I don’t realise I’m thinking about something else until I zone back in and find out that I hadn’t been concentrating on anything I just read. That is probably why Revelation is my favorite book in the bible because  it intrigues me the most I guess… Fear not! I found a solution. Or, the solution found me.

I am currently reading the Soul Survivor NIV Bible In a Year. Mike and Andy also upload daily videos to help us understand what we are reading which is very very helpful for me I must say. Now, I have failed many times and missed many days but I haven’t given up on it so we’re good! :)

I realise that the title of this blog post makes no sense as yet… It will guys, it will.
You may know that I watch youtubers like Zoe and Ingrid and Fleur. But I came across a youtuber called Cambria Joy and as well as her other videos she makes weekly bible studies too and they are SO good. They are like little 5-10 minute sermons but with so much thought-provoking stuff. There’s much encouragement, joy and inspiration in her videos. So I wanted to share one with you.

I noted down some of the things she said and verses she referred to in my journal.
For example, she said things like ‘Do whatever you’re doing for the Lord and you will find joy.’ and ‘If you’re scared about the future, God will accept you with open arms.’
She also refers to Mathew 6:21 where she challenges us to think about where our treasures lie. Because, we were made to worship something. Whether its money or relationships or attention. We, as human beings, crave something all the time and only God can fully satisfy it. The verse before that, (Mathew 6:20) says that our treasure is in heaven and God is our strength and our song. There is just so much I could write about this one video but I encourage you to watch them because they really are great, light hearted videos and you can really see that she means every single word she says.

On that note, I’m going to go and make some banana pancakes :D have a lovely, lovely day!

When A Good Day Is Great.

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Today was going to be a good day. I am excited for the Perth College Open Day tomorrow (like how I slipped that in there? More later.) and my Orthodontist appointment was over so I no longer had to worry about it. But a few things made my day even better… Firstly, in music I finally understood how to play a song that I had been struggling with. For me, this is ace because I want to do well in this subject and it stresses me out a lot when I just can’t grasp something. Then, in English I got my Personal/Reflective essay back and passed it at Higher Standard. Woop! I think it might have been a NAB because we didn’t get grades. Just a pass or a fail. So I am so thankful for that..! English is flipping hard. Then… then… in Art I have been working on a piece and it was seriously going horrifically. We had our reviews and the standard of my work was not at all Higher level. Then, I started this piece again, I have been going to the Art Department in my free periods and now its competing with one of the best Higher Art pieces in the department. Oh yeeea! I don’t usually brag about stuff like this but I am kinda proud of it because I really was struggling. It shows though that extra time and hard work pays off. A picture of it will be at the bottom of this blog post.

Anyway, you’re probably wondering where this sudden Perth College Open Day came from. Well, basically, I am planning on applying for German at a couple of universities and Music at some colleges. I mean, I’m applying for German because thats ‘my subject’ if you know what I mean. Like, some people are associated with being good at sciences or maths or English or art but I am good at German. However, it isn’t exactly what I want to do for the rest of my life. I enjoy it (most of the time) and I’m good at it but I actually want to study Music much, much more. So, I am going to Perth College Open Day because they have one of the best Music programs in the UK and I am hoping I will fall in love with it so that I will have even more motivation for it. I spend a lot of my free periods in the music department. I love going into a practice room and being able to just play and sing between classes. Sometimes I don’t feel particularly productive but I always want to go to the music department. That’s the thing about music. There isn’t a lot I can do in any mood I’m in but with music, I can be happy, sad, disappointed or confused but I’ll still always go back to my little practice room. I am gradually gaining confidence though, so this is good. Yesterday at youth group I sat, played guitar and sang for ages. People were walking past and around me and singing with me and I didn’t seem to mind. So we are getting somewhere. I would never have been able to do that a few months ago. Slowly but surely ;) Anyway, back to Perth. Tomorrow I have the day off school to take a train down to the college. I have a tun of homework to do on the train or if I get there early (which I most likely will because I gave myself 2 hours to get from the train station to the college. It takes half an hour to walk to the college. Lol!) I am so excited and nervous! I will also post some pictures of the college so you can see! :) images OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA webster

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Edinburgh, St.Andrews And Why I Love Book Stores.

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I’m sure we have grasped by now that I love road trips. Like really love them. Blasting music in the car, laughing, taking photos, singing, eating, talking. Nothing in that list sounds unappealing to me. So, because Thursday and yesterday were in-service days, I took a trip to St Andrews to visit my brother for his 20th birthday. Twenteen I like to say. On the way, I also stopped in Edinburgh because I had never actually explored the city. I mean, I’ve been to the airport a catrillion (pretty sure that is most definately not a word. Mind you, Twenteen isn’t either. so…) times and I’ve seen the castle but I don’t remember exploring the city and the gardens. I have a thing about gardens in big cities. I seriously love them so much. Its a bit like why I love book shops. Even in the hustle and bustle of a city there is something about book shops and gardens that are always much more peaceful even though they can still be right in the center of the busy city. If Ya know what I mean? :) I mean, if I’m honest, the business did get a bit too much at times because I myself, was trying to find my way around amongst all the hectic-ness of a city so I went into waterstones. I took a look around, where everybody looked incredibly intelligent and sat on the stairs. Who sits on the stairs in a shop? I don’t really… except in book stores. They are so homely and relaxing. I should probably stop raving about books stores about now, huh?

Anyway, I spent a few hours looking around, taking photos, doing a bit of shopping.
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After that, we carried on driving to St Andrews to my brothers house where I stayed over night. We also went for dinner and to the cinema.
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I don’t even know how many words I created in this blog post ;) but I had a lovely time! And it feels like it should be Monday but its only Saturday. Woo!

11 Study Tips.

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As I sit here with my large mug of tea (as per usual) I am mulling over the amount of homework I have left for myself over this long weekend and the utter disgrace it is that I haven’t blogged in so long. So, I figured I would give you some study tips that I saw in a Youtube video. This is for school or college or anything really!

1. Do the hardest homework first.
I don’t know about you, but I have the tendency to start with the easy stuff. It is just much more comfortable to start the hours of homework with something easy. However, this is actually a very good tip because then the homework gets more and more relaxing the more fed up you get… so it kind of works! ;)

2. Have a study group.
Now, this is kind of a hit or miss. It really all depends who is in your study group or who you study with. In sixth year, we have a sixth year library which I often use to study. My friends come in as well and sometimes I am extremely studious but other times…. not so much. It is helpful to find someone who likes being productive and wants to get work done, other wise it pretty much a waste of time.

3. Take Breaks.
Oh yes. Take food breaks! Sometimes when I have a ‘study day’, I reward myself with a Costa or something that tastes good to look forward to because, I mean, what is better than food? nothing. Point made.

4. Listen To Music.
This might not be the same for everyone. Some people might be able to study best in silence, or in the hustle and bustle of a coffee shop, or listening to classical or pop music. It totally depends on what study environment is most effective for you :) Personally, it totally depends on my mood. Sometimes, I need complete silence but other times I like to listen to music. If I am reading a book, I can’t listen to music with words because it confuses me and I end up listening to the song instead of concentrating on the book. I can never work in a overly loud area but apart from that, I’m pretty flexible. I also like listening to music without words because it cancels out surrounding sound but doesn’t make me want to start a song and dance.

5. Test Yourself.
There are many online resources to use that you can test yourself with. As well as this, you could use flash cards or ask a friend to test you with questions. When I am learning concepts or preparing a talk, I like to use flash cards. That is just one method :) I am actually very good at memorizing essays in my short term memory. I know its probably not the best… but for Art exams I always just memorize the essays the night before so they are fresh in my mind and it always works for me. I did get an A in Art so I’m not kidding you! but it does totally depend on what works best for you :)

6. Don’t study late at night.
I disagree somewhat with this point.. reason being is that different people find it easier to study at different times. I prefer studying in the after noon but some like studying really early in the morning and others late at night. However, if its the night before an exam then I totally recommend you have a good night sleep!

7. Make Organised Notes.
I am such an organised person. I’m one of those people that are always asked what the homework is or what dates things are due because people just know that I write everything in my planner. I have to do it though because other wise I’ll forget but if its in my planner I HAVE to do it. Its the same for notes, if they are organised, colour co-ordinated and easy to read then studying is automatically less stressful. If you have different notes flying all over the place of unrelated pieces of paper, very little is going to make sense.

8.Use Harmonic Devices.
This is something my brother used to do. He used to make songs out of information he had to remember. I haven’t tried this yet but I think it could be effective.

9. Write your own notes.
In College or University, there may be loads of people that takes their laptops into lectures. I am yet to discover whether I like taking notes on paper or on my laptop better because we don’t use laptops at school but make sure you know what works best for you!

10. Use a planner.
See point 7.

11. Write Your Own Study Guide.
There are many study guides available in book stores or online but if you don’t have access to them, you could also make your own. You could have a piece of information with questions following or you could make spider diagrams. I like to make spider diagrams and colour co-ordinate them. There are many different ways :)

FINISHED!

So, apart from the homework I have left myself over this weekend, I also have some exciting things going on. These weeks have been crazy and they are about to get even crazier. On Thursday night, I am going to see ‘If I Stay’ at the cinema with some of my friends (SO excited…). Friday and Saturday I am going to Edinburgh and then to visit my brother in St Andrews. On Monday I have the Orthadontest (*cry*), Wednesday I am going to Perth College Open Day :) and on Thursday all music students are going to see the Scottish Chamber Orchestra at the theater. Busy busy busy…
But I kinda love it.

Steady Heart by Steffany Gretzinger

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Steady Heart by Steffany Gretzinger (cover)

How long as it been? Almost a month. I am so sorry. As lame an excuse as it is, I have been really very busy with school. I think about blogging everyday but just don’t get around it. After realising how long it has been, I thought I should check in and say hi before I head off to Life Group in 15 mins. I covered a song from Steffany Gretzinger a little while ago and forgot to share it on my blog. I really love this song. I hope you do too.

A Girl Who Loves Music.

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I found this blog post and thought it was so sweet and so true. (even if it is super cheesy. But we have got to the point where we all know that I really don’t care if its cheesy ;) In fact, it makes me love it even more. )

A girl who loves music is a girl who sings. She can lift up your spirit whenever you
are in the lowest point of your life. She can sing for you while you both look at the gloomy
skies as it rains very hard. She can sing you a lullaby when you wake up at 2A.M. and can’t
go back to sleep. She can whisper a soothing hum close to your ears making your angry
heart calm down, driving all your disappointments, frustrations, anxieties, all your stress
and pressures away.

A girl who loves music is a girl who dances. Whenever things go wrong
unexpectedly, she’ll just dance with the rhythm and overcome her problems. She can be
jolly and silly sometimes, but these will just make her even prettier. She can dance
with you the whole night and wait until sunrise to watch the sun as it brightens up your
faces while the birds sing cheerfully your love story.

A girl who loves music is emotional. She reminisces your wonderful moments
together upon hearing her favorite songs. She cries every time you’re away while
listening to your love songs. She is compassionate towards other people for she can also feel
their sad melodies and can hear their agonies at every beat of their hearts.

A girl who loves music is a great listener. She pays attention to every word that
you say and remembers it all just like how she memorizes the lyrics of her 500 favorite
songs word by word in just one week. Every conversation with her is worthwhile. You don’t
need to worry if you can’t relate with her for she will always understand that people are
unique and have different attitudes, just like music that has myriad genres: rock, pop, etc.
It’s impossible to be bored while talking with her for every word that she’ll speak, she’ll add
a colorful tune, thus making even the nonsense words exciting to listen.

A girl who loves music is a poet. But she doesn’t need to speak to express her love.
Instead, you can already see her poetic devices written inside her cute and charming eyes,
the rhyme and meter you can observe in her mesmerizing smile. She may be very
paradoxical sometimes making her very hard to understand. You can never have an idea
what caused her to be angry at you but she will never let the day end without you hugging
each other again.

 

 Original – Date A Girl Who Loves Music

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13 (very) Random Things About Me.

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There are many random things about me that I thought would be fun to share with you all. I saw this on Instagram where someone wrote 10 random things about themselves. It was so funny to read because even though we try to be ‘cool’ and everything, there are some really weird and random things about each and every one of us that isn’t always easy to realize until we really think about it. As I started to jot down some ideas I realized that there are many more than 10 and many more than 13 things but as I said, sometimes its hard to realize. These are in no order what so ever,  I’m just kinda going for it… As random a number as 13 is, here are 13 random things about me: 

1. I love plane journeys but flying over water freaks me out. 
Lets just take a moment here. How many times have I been on a plane? I don’t even know but I am so so thankful for it all because I love to travel. I love planes. Like, love love love them but I get so scared going over water. Even though crashing on ground is worse, there’s something about drowning (above all other ways of dying) that really scares me. 

Well that was a bit depressing. Don’t worry it gets happier ;)

2. I think writing letters is still the way to go.
I love technology and Facebook and everything but receiving a letter is just the best. Someone spending time to write a letter is just the cutest thing and I love it. Plus, pen pals are just the coolest things…

3. I have many weird obsessions.
These include, flower and shell picking, the colour blue, tea, America and notebooks. I can’t really explain these to you.

4. I hate many things.
These include, fish, bacon and baths. Again, I can’t explain these to you.

5. To-do lists rock my world.
There is just something very satisfying about ticking off something that needs to be done. I like being organised. I don’t like not knowing whats happening and I really don’t like being late. I am one of those people who still have a paper diary instead of a calender on my phone ;) I never understood the whole phone calender thing.

6. Hugs make everything better.
No explanation needed.

7. Sunbathing really bores me.
I mean, lets face it, I will never get a tan. Its just hopeless, there’s no point in stressing myself out about it ;) Nah, I actually like having pale skin. I just can’t sunbathe for any length of time. I need to read a book or go swimming. Night time is for sleeping, there’s no need for it in the day;)

8. I love the smell of new carpets.
Don’t ask.

9. I love, love.
I just think it’s the most beautiful thing. Getting a tad cheesy here, I know. 

10. Painting my nails really stresses me out.
I have a problem….I don’t like not having my nails painted but I really detest painting them. 1. I can’t paint my nails, I’m not really very good at it. 2. I’m not patient enough to wait for it to dry. And knowing my luck, I always need the toilet straight after painting them so that’s always a bit of a dilemma. Its either, ruin your nails or painfully wait for them to dry. I often go for the ruin your nails option. The pain just isn’t worth it. 

11. I am extremely protective over my earphones.
I am a very sociable person. I’m always up for hanging out with friends and all that jazz but I can also be very unsociable. I like being alone and having my own space. And when I can’t be alone, music gives me my own space. If that even makes sense? I like to just block the world out sometimes. Plus, teenagers can really annoy me. I can’t survive a bus journey or a walk home from school (if I’m not with a friend) without music. It just doesn’t happen. My earphones are the one thing I don’t let people borrow because I don’t know what I’d do if I couldn’t find them or if I lost them. Its a bit weird, but there ya go. Also, I don’t like the whole ‘lets listen to music together’ milarky either. I like hearing all the instruments not just half of them. Do you know what I mean? It just doesn’t sound as good with one earphone in. Anyway, enough about that ;)

12. I take everything everywhere.
You will very rarely see me without a bag of some sort. I always take a lot with me. I’m the kind of ‘go to girl’ if someone needs something. Tissues, inhalers, pens, make-up, paper, water and chewing gum are things people always need so someone has to be prepared. I always take a book with me everywhere as well. You never know when you’ll need something to do. I take my homework everywhere too… I rarely take my make-up because, honestly, applying it once is enough but other people might need it so… you get the idea ;) 

13. Cute things are just ‘my thing’.
I love everything cute. People often associate me with being cute because I just love cute clothes, cute photos, cute ornaments, cute animals, cute everything. In fact, just to prove my point, my friend just texted me saying that we should go and find cute things for her new home:’)

This will either have made you laugh or think that I am an extremely weird person (which I am, so that is totally OK with me :) ) Or both.

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I Love What I’m Scared Of.

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I just came home. Drenched and cold. Do you ever have those days where you just need to go for a walk? yup.. well maybe when its nice weather. It was pouring but I still went. Jacket on, non-waterproof shoes on, headphones in and of I went. I knew where I was going. I was going to one of my favorite places, the garden. Many of you might know where it is but I don’t really tell many people. Many.. as in 1. The good thing about going for walks in the rain is that no one is around. Its peaceful. The sound of the rain is peaceful and my music makes me happy. I can sing aloud till my hearts content and that’s what I did. I just needed to think and have space to think and to pray. I had a little outburst at God this evening.. I said to him “God, do you know how much I want to go to IHOP Uni?! Can you not just show me what to do!” 

Your probably a tad confused at the moment? Well, IHOP is the International House Of Prayer in Kansas city, America. America!! They have a University which includes an Academy of Ministry, an Academy of Music and others. 

Academy of Music… where you don’t need to be a certain level to attend.. ‘FMA (Forerunner Music Academy) is geared to take the one who knows nothing to being able to be proficient in the instrument they choose.’ Perfect. More than perfect. They have such a heart for their students. To help people influence the world. Because we are more powerful than we think we are in Christ. 

You guys know how much I love music and how much I want to try my hardest to pursue music. Its the thing that scares me most. Getting up there and leading worship. I can’t harmonize to save my life so I prefer leading.. My friend once said to me ‘If God wasn’t with you, He wouldn’t give you the last bit of courage to get up there and do it.’ I worry and worry and then when I’m actually worshiping it is my favorite place in the whole world. Seriously. I love it more than I’m scared of it and I never want to leave. Its actually quite difficult to worship while you lead. That’s something I need to work on too and I really want to go to IHOP to learn, to discover and to grow in a country I never stop talking about. Like ever. 

I just don’t know.. I mean, maybe God does want me to pursue Music but maybe its not at IHOP. It would be awesome if it was but I am struggling to figure out what to do. I mean, Gods going to have to hurry up because if I do go to IHOP then I’ll need to start fundraising extremely soon. God always provides though so I shouldn’t worry about that. I just want to know whether its the right thing because ‘God doesn’t plant a desire in someones heart that he doesn’t plan to fulfill.’ Right?

I can’t remember all the encouraging things people have said to me.. but some are:

” You are going to influence the world.” (this one.. I was like, wow. I was really really young when someone told me this at church so that is just the gist of what she said to me. How am I going to influence the world? through music or something else?)

“I can tell your a musician. You sing everywhere.”

“You really blessed me with that song.”

“I can tell you have a real desire for it and your heart is in the right place for it.” 

And, I only have the guitar I have because the person that gave it to me felt that God wanted him to give it to me.. 

So, these are my prayers just now. Please pray for clarity and provision in the way God leads me. Thank you my lovelies. 

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Why I Love My Bestfriend ;)

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So this blog post is for my bestfriend/sister, Rachael. You probably know who she is by now but just in case, here we are :)

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There are many more than 5 reasons but because its really late and I am one tired girl, I think 5 wonderful reasons is a good number ;) I can’t even remember how long Rachael and I have known each other. But we have been friends for a good 6 or 7 years so I thought this deserves a blog post :D I don’t even care how cheesy this will be.

1. She knows me inside out. 

Literally knows everything. She knows things like the exact amount of milk I like in my tea. Or which pieces of salad I like.. Or if something would be to spicy for me or how much pink is too much pink for me. All these little things that really, I’m pretty sure only she knows. To be honest, if one of us have a boyfriend, my advice would be to speak to the best friend. They know everything. Rachael and I have actually had these discussions. Rachael could tell you my perfect date or my perfect wedding dress. We’re getting detailed here… ;) She knows what do to cheer me up. She knows that making me a card will melt my heart much more than trying to take me out and cheer me up when I’m sad. The list is endless… I tell her absolutely everything. She pretty much knows an exact account of my life;) We know the good and the bad and we never judge each other. 

2. She is always there for me.

Rachael and I always cry together. Its good to have someone to cry with to be honest. We just know that we can phone each other day or night and if I randomly arrive at her door she’ll always be there for a good cry. Rachael has lived through everything with me and has never left but instead, walked with me. We often have lengthy heart to hearts. A lot of the time they are at 1am when we’re meant to be sleeping. She’s always been there and I don’t have a scooby what I’d do with out her. Honestly, I couldn’t live without my best friend ;) 

3. She is the sister I never had.

Sometimes, you just need a sister. Sisters can be very annoying. I’m not going to lie here, we can annoy each other. We have never actually had a full blown argument. We just frustrate each other sometimes. I’m sure Rachael will agree. We are actually quite different and it kinda clashes sometimes but we’re best friends. So… because we tell each other everything, we can’t not speak for more than a day because then we have to update each other on our lives every 5 seconds ;) Also, Rachael has the most precious parents. Her mum and dad are my second parents. They always make sure that I feel part of the family and I always try my best to make sure they know how much I appreciate it. Their love for each other amazes me and I love them with my whole heart and I seriously don’t know what I would do without them. Rachael, I know secretly you know how awesome your parents are ;)  but they are parents and your their teenage daughter and I am also one of those so I know how it is ;) 

4. I can be as weird as I want and not care.

We are both extremely strange people. Although at school I can come across as quite quiet if you don’t know me, your mind will be totally changed. I do actually love being quiet but I am very strange and loud and Rachael is too. We just don’t care when we’re hanging out. It makes life more fun I guess :) 

5. We have THE best inside jokes and code words.

Now… they are code words for a reason.. they are in fact extremely handy. So when we’re in public we don’t have to embarrass ourselves, but instead use these. (Pretty sure you know what I’m talking about Rach ;) ) Also, we have signals for when we see attractive guys. Lets remember we are teenagers ;) Its pretty normal, I’m sure. We even have code names for people. I’m not going to go in depth here but it is just the best having inside jokes. 

Rach! I love you and you are my favorite person in the whole world. I will always be here because you are my sister and your such a precious girly! See you soon :)

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